Five Lessons Learnt This Week

This week in Five Lessons Learnt: why Minions are banned from Morrisons, the bizarre things people will complain about, what lettuce grown in space tastes like, how to defend yourself from a seagull attack and why a man has grown an extra ear…

1. It’s not all jolly on holiday

Screen Shot 2015-08-12 at 12.11.46If you’ve been too busy trading to find the time for a summer holiday, don’t feel too bad. It turns out this year’s holidaymakers haven’t had the best of times and haven’t been shy about sharing their thoughts. So travel companies have compiled some of their ridiculous (yet hilarious) complaints for our enjoyment. Here are a few of the things this year’s holidaymakers weren’t loving…

  • “The tour guide was too ugly.” 
  • “The beach had too many fat people.”
  • “The street signs weren’t in English.”
  • “The local women were too beautiful – it made me feel bad.”
  • “Disneyland was too touristy.”
  • “Alaska wasn’t warm enough.”
  • “The volcano in our resort had no lava on it. I think it was just a mountain.”
  • “The sea was too loud.” (On a cruise, we might add…)

And our personal favourite…

  • “My fiancé and I booked a twin-bedded room but were put in a double-bedded room. We now hold you responsible for the fact that I find myself pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked.” 

It seems there really is no pleasing some people.

Still yet to head off on holiday? Check out some of these top travel spots for traders – but please, promise us you won’t whinge that the sun is too hot or the beach too sandy… 

2. Minions aren’t allowed in Morrisons

Screen Shot 2015-08-12 at 11.17.16Going out in fancy dress? You might want to think twice before popping into your local supermarket to grab some groceries after a man named Mike found himself thrown out of Morrisons in Preston after trying to buy bananas while dressed as a Minion.

Mike was dressed up as one of the famous yellow cartoon characters to support his friends who were taking part in a 22-mile charity walk, and decided to call into the supermarket to pick up some bananas as fuel for his mates. But he created a bit of a stir as customers asked him to pose for photos – leading to the manager throwing him out before he reached the fruit aisle. Despicable…

But there are two sides to every story, and Morrisons reckon the misbehaving Minion was causing havoc in store by running up and down the aisles. A spokeswoman for Morrisons said the supermarket welcomes Minions into all their stores – but only well-behaved ones…

Fancy getting involved in a charity challenge (Minion costume optional)? Read all about the traders who rowed the Med and cycled the French alps – and then choose your challenge from our list of charity events

3. There’s something growing in space

Screen Shot 2015-08-12 at 11.39.12But it’s not anything sinister… it’s salad. Astronauts aboard the International Space Station made lettuce history this week after tucking into space-grown salad – the first vegetables ever to be cultivated and eaten on board.

Apparently, the astronauts’ verdict on the leaves ranged from “pretty good” to “awesome” – high praise for salad. The seeds were grown under LED lights which stimulate plant growth as part of an initiative to find ways for crews to sustain themselves on longer journeys, such as an eventual trip to Mars.

We’re not sure how far they’ll get on lettuce alone, but hey – one small step for salad vegetables is one giant leaf for mankind…

4. It’s raining seagulls

Screen Shot 2015-08-12 at 11.28.39A NatWest branch in Ipswich, Suffolk found itself in a spot of bother after customers were unable to enter the brand without being swooped on by dive-bombing seagulls who were trying to protect a baby gull nesting on the bank roof. Two customers told staff they’d been hit on the head by the protective birds, though thankfully they were more stunned than injured.

Branch manager Lorna McQueen phoned the RSPCA to see what to do about the pesky gulls and was told not to try to move the baby. Instead, she was advised to use an umbrella as protection from the swooping seagulls – so she took it upon herself to escort customers to and from the bank under a large black umbrella she (thankfully) had in the back of her car.

That definitely calls for a bonus. And do tell us what bright ideas she has for protecting customers from bank charges and interest rates…

5. Ears looking at you

Screen Shot 2015-08-12 at 13.55.47And listening, it seems. Performance artist Sterlac (real name Stelios Arcadiou) has had a third ear built on his arm so that people all over the world can hear what he’s up to. Creepy but true – nope, this isn’t a wind-up. Sterlac came up with the idea back in 1996 and eventually convinced a team of boffins to implant his own tissue into his arm to create the extra organ.

He is now planning to have the team use stem cells to make the ear more three-dimensional so that he can have a microchip implanted and hooked up to WiFi so people can follow his conversations and listen to what’s going on wherever he is.

Sterlac says he wants to keep the ear hooked up to the internet 24/7 so everyone can hear what he’s up to. But we can’t help but ask – who would want to listen in on every minute of someone’s day?!

We can’t say this is a tech development we’re looking forward to seeing… but for some that we are, check out our feature on the future tech trends we’re excited about

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